TOWER HEIST

Eddie Murphy is funny in this movie but no one else is; he gets laughs in almost all of his scenes and these are essentially the only laughs in the film.  He hovers around the periphery of the first half hour of the movie, threatening to beat Ben Stiller's ass for no reason, shouting to a woman (whilst he's being arrested) to get her teeth fixed up, and threatening to beat Ben Stiller's ass for no reason.  Bless his heart.  It's quite enjoyable, especially if you miss the old-school smooth-talking hustler persona of Eddie Murphy from such classics as 48 Hrs or Trading Places or Beverly Hills Cop or The Distinguished Gentleman or...  Man, Eddie was so funny.  He still is!  This proves it.  He just needs some better movies.

Director Brett Ratner was going to produce this year's Oscar telecast and bring along Eddie Murphy to host but then he said "rehearsing is for fags" out loud and in front of people who had no trouble hearing him so he had to drop out during the inevitable controversy.  What a stupid thing to say.  I can't really defend him.  But isn't it weird that Hollywood gets much more upset at people like Ratner (or Mel Gibson) for saying really stupid shit than it does at people like Roman Polanski (or Mike Tyson) for doing really evil shit?  And considering that Brett Ratner once gave an interview where he said he received oral sex from a man, does that make what he said more or less offensive?

~ There's some mildly clever direction in the film, but it peaks in the opening shot that pulls back from Ben Franklin's face to reveal a garish 50 dollar bill themed swimming pool and then pulls back further to reveal the pool perched precariously atop a penthouse apartment on a Manhattan highrise.  This pool ends up being WAY too important to the plot.

~ Matthew Broderick has a few moments that produce grins or mild chuckles, but it's not even close to being not even close to Eddie.  If it were a race, Eddie would be Prefontaine, Broderick would be some kid on crutches, and everybody else would be fucking dead and buried.

~ The third act plot twists are about as logical as those featured in a Chuck Norris movie or an episode of Inspector Gadget.

~ Heavy D appears in this movie for about two seconds; not the best or worst final appearance that an actor has made.

~ There is SHIT TONS of wasted talent in this film: Ben Stiller, Casey Affleck, Alan Alda, Tea Leoni, Michael Pena, Zeljko Ivanek, Judd Hirsch, Gabourey Sidibe and other people whose names don't rhyme with Ready Rurphy.

~ This movie was originally pitched as the black version of Ocean's 11 but somehow turned into this.

~ This is a PG-13 film which means they can still get away with a few N words (as long as they flow black to white and not vice versa) and a 'bumbaclot' or two.

~ Homer Simpson said of the character he voiced, Poochie, that when he wasn't onscreen the other characters should be asking "Where's Poochie?"  I like to say that a movie fulfills the so-called Poochie Rule when what Homer said is true for one it's characters.  It certainly works here for Eddie.  Whenever Eddie is not onscreen, the audience (and the characters) are just waiting for him to return and make things funny again.